Now at least I can see how I react and can take steps to deal with it. The most beautiful thing about me most days is the fruits of my recovery. I relate to my fellow human beings when I am not in fear spiritual malady or shame. Nobody wants to be out of control, to be teetering on the verge of the next disaster, the next moving of home, the next calling of the police, the next swirling carousel of unmanageabiilty.
- Or rather what emotions he is experiencing at any particular time.
- The Twelve Traditions encourage members to practice the spiritual principle of anonymity in the public media and members are also asked to respect each other’s confidentiality.
- Sins were a contagion that mixed with the sins of others and the sins of families, groups, societies, cultures and countries.
- Things may change over time, and you never know when or how your beliefs might evolve.
- My dismissiveness and my arrogance are parts of defence mechanism against rejection, they guard my inherent sense of shame.
I have for several years wondered if the spiritual malady described in the Big Book adequate or accurate enough in describing what I suffer from. Taking a commercial inventory is a fact-finding and a fact-facing process. Though our decision was a vital and crucial step, it could have little permanent effect unless at once followed by a strenuous effort to face, and to be rid of, the things in ourselves which had been blocking us. The reason we cannot just quit is that our mind constantly has us believe that we can control and enjoy our drinking. No matter what the consequences were in the past, our mind will be obsessed with the thought of drinking. Recovered means free from the obsession and constant struggle to stay sober.
Why is it so dangerous to be self-reliant when suffering from an addiction?
Desire obviously runs contrary to the idea of being in God’s will, in fact it is being in Self Will that seems to create distress in many people with addictive behaviours. When I have a fear of not getting stuff and this is linked to insecurity, as mentioned in the Big Book, it is usually in relation to my pocket book, financial insecurity, personal relationships, self esteem etc.
- The first thing apparent was that this world and its people were often quite wrong.
- None of these things are conducive to a healthy recovery.
- However, there seems to be a problem specifically with a patterned mesh of negative emotions which are activated when someone upsets me.
- As overwhelming as I’m sure this all may seem for someone who’s either never had a spiritual connection, or been disconnected for years, I’d like to assure you it’s not as formidable as it may seem.
- Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
I have suggested clearly in previous blogs how I think AA’s 12 recovery programme helps specifically with problems of emotion dysregulation. If we start by trying to recover from alcoholism and addiction and find we still have other issues then obviously address these with outside professional and specialist help. One can see how this concept of sin disease or in other words spiritual malady could be and was applied to early AA and incorporated into the Big Book of AA. Sins I believe are the poisoned fruit of fear, often helped along in alcoholics by false pride, shame and guilt. These defects are related to me being an alcoholic, they are intrinsic to my condition. I sin so naturally, effortlessly and usually without even trying. I believe my so-called defects of character are linked to my underlying emotional disorder of alcoholism.
I want to find a Higher Power. How do I do this?
That being so you have swallowed and digested some big chunks of truth about yourself. Suppose we fall short of the chosen ideal and stumble? If we are sorry for what we have done, and have the honest desire to let God take us to better things, we believe we will be forgiven and https://ecosoberhouse.com/ will have learned our lesson. If we are not sorry, and our conduct continues to harm others, we are quite sure to drink. Counsel with persons is often desirable, but we let God be the final judge. We realize that some people are as fanatical about sex as others are loose.
What does it mean to be spiritually sick?
Illness attributed to supernatural forces may be due to soul loss, ancestral spirits, tame household spirits, wild forest spirits, malevolent spirits, or shaman spirits, but can also be attributed to magical interferences by humans in the form of curses.
Addiction and alcoholism are both a 3 fold disease, meaning there are three distinct areas that alcoholism affects and the reason you cannot stop drinking and using. The word ‘God’ can be a total turn-off for many of us. It is loaded with old ideas and religiosity, tainted by overuse, abuse, and centuries of bad press. It is sad that countless addicts and alcoholics have rejected 12 Step recovery because the G_d word is up on the wall and included in prayers and literature. If you’re struggling to find a Higher Power in AA, know that you’re not alone. There are many people who have been in your shoes and have found creative ways to work around this issue.
My thoughts* on ACIM, Lesson 199, WARNING; Graphic Sexual Descriptions and Triggers.
The specific directions in the first 102 pages of the book Alcoholic Anonymous. But when it comes to alcohol and drugs, there is no will power. The reason is that our reaction to alcohol and drugs is physical, it’s not mental. We cannot control our abnormal reaction to alcohol.
Why is the 12th step so important?
12 Step meetings allow you to meet others in similar situations who will reassure you that you are not alone as well as provide you with advice on how to get through obstacles that may challenge your recovery.
My recovery has thus since been about “growing up” a bit, however unsuccessful I am in this pursuit on occasion. It shows the areas of behaviour and attitudes that can be treated by working the steps.
Entitlement leads to unrealistic expectations, which often leads to disappointment and resentment. People in the rooms refer to this as a ‘god-sized hole’. It’s a void that we used to fill with drugs and alcohol. We will try to fill this god-sized hole with anything we can. Regardless of how it manifests itself, a spiritual malady is always rooted in an inner conflict.
We are in a sense co-dependent on other people for our sense of esteem. We rely on others in terms of how we feel about ourselves. A decade of therapy also showed Bill Wilson he has two default settings in his relationship to other human beings – he either tried to dominate them or he became dependent on them for his sense of self and emotional well being. In other words, he became dependent on others, on external means for approval and elevating his self esteem. As Bill Wilson noted, we seem to get distressed when we don’t get what we want or feel people or trying to take away what we have. As a person in recovery I can definitively relate. AA provides many ways of becoming more emotionally well, which ultimately means more emotionally mature.